Saturday, April 7, 2007

77 Days

Spring sucks. Don’t get me wrong, I love all the sunshine, flowers blooming and getting to finally go “ow-sigh” as Robby puts it. It’s just that I can look back on my life and just about everything horrible thing that ever happened to me happened in the spring. I am an autumn person. I was born in November and good things happen to me in the fall. Related? I don’t know if my astrological sign has anything to do with it or not. How about your life? Are a summer baby and tragedy happens in the winter?

So far this spring I’ve had a process server at my door, have had so much congestion that I haven’t heard out of my right ear for going on 2 months, had major problems with my marriage and struggled with how to support a friend with cancer. How’s your spring going? Did I mention that when we drain the bathtub water leaks from the garage ceiling?

No one likes to hear about other people’s problems. I do not want to be the person you avoid because you really don’t want to hear about their latest tragedy. Everyone has problems. I know that my problems don’t compare to health problems, being homeless, having your house burn down or coping with a loved one’s death. I know. Robby is healthy, thriving and happy. Things could be a lot worse. I know. But despite all of that my problems are MY problems. They affect the daily quality of my life and the lives of those around me.

Attitude you say? Well, I’ve tried that. It doesn’t work in the spring for me. Normally, when life gets a little overwhelming and I get caught up in little mundane nuisances I will try to change my outlook. Service to others is one. If I get involved and help someone else, I find I am not so caught up in my own stuff and the good feeling of helping someone else is just the shot in the arm I need to move forward in my own life. This especially works if I think that the other person’s problems are much worse than mine. Then I get a bonus dose of gratitude as well. Accentuating the positive is always good when the “bluckys” strike as well. It’s hard for me to fake happiness though. So, when my nose is really up against “the wall” accentuating the positive only serves to piss me off more.
So what’s a girl to do? I’m doing the best I can at any given moment throughout the day. Oh, and counting the days until summer officially starts.

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